74 lines of perl so far

My Cycling Log

2004-10-13 07:57:40 411

Greatest Fark headline: Britney wants to change her last name to "Federline." Apparently "McUsedupskank" was already taken

How many other people do you know who have brought their girlfriend's stethoscope to her on Main in Starkvegas at freaking 6 AM?

2004-10-11 23:07:49 410

Chopper Dave is on!

Whose little brother is a left winged Kerry supporting liberal? Not mine.

2004-10-11 15:52:15 409

Canada is the European daughter left out on the doorstep with Britain's prodigal son next door.

2004-10-08 09:23:51 408

Rule #2 for tonight's debate regarding restrictions for the public viewing area: No balloons filled with substances other than air or projectile launchers. That means that you can bring Stinger missles, sniper rifles, pea shooters, etc... into the debate as long as you put them into a balloon. With a weather balloon you could bring in a load of stuff.

2004-10-08 09:00:40 407

BOFM 2004 #34

2004-10-08 01:54:10 406

At good ole Brewski's, I took ID #4 tonight. Sadly this one is not going into my collection. Note to silly kids: do not go into a place with someone else's ID who has worked there before. I left it taped to the wall so that the jackass who it belongs to can come get it. For a recount, #3 was an expired (in 2002) Georgia restricted DUI ID that very clearly states "Only Valid in Georgia." #2 is an expired (02/04) Mississippi license. Another note to the kids: if you are going to use your older buddies expired ID, memorize the freaking birthday. At least know the birthday, knowing the social helps too, but every four year old knows their birthday so hopefully twenty-one year olds will too. #1 is what got me started in this adventure. Kids came in a little before closing Brewski's a few months back and wanted a keg. That's right, a freaking keg. Standard procedure is to take information directly from their license. So the kid freaked out a little when he had to take it out of the wallet for me. It *was* a pretty ID, he had access to a real nice printer and photo paper, but there was no attempt at a hologram at all. I pulled the photo paper off and gave him back the real license that had been the backing. How nice of me, now all he had to do was run home and print another out. I wonder if it violates any kind of security laws if I were to scan these ID's and share with the rest of the internet. I *guess* it would be ethical to blur out the socials or something but that kills part of the fun.

The recipe for the winning burger of the Build a Better Burger contest. My favorite is this one. Heart attack between two buns.

People in Oklahoma are weenies. What this article leaves out about the "grammatical mistakes" is that instead of referring to the common pastime as "cow manure tossing" but "cowshit throw'n." Plus, to be one of the cool kids in Oklahoma, one has to help out reenacting one of those decisive Oklahoma battles that turned the war of Northern Aggression in favor of those damned Yankees. Yes, out of the seven mighty battles fought in Oklahoma, almost all of them involved the Confederates fighting at least some Native Americans. The last battle actually had Native AND African Americans fighting against Confederates. So just imagine the policial correctness of a group of Oklahoma Confederates firing cannons at Indians and black people while they are playing a game tossing cowshit! The ramifications are mind boggling!

2004-10-04 23:52:19 405

Yay! Cron can use words now to run at the right time:
@hourly ntpdate

2004-10-03 01:44:00 404

When having sound quality issues, first check to see that your audio cables are fully inserted.

My pretty little 250 GB love child of a hard drive likes to crap out after being up for about 24 hours. I am blaming it on the cheap cheap controller card of course. Bill is in *testing* mode with my main 120 and the 250 running off of the primary interface. Hopefully this will teach me a lesson of buying crappy interface cards to go with expensive hard drives. I would like to learn that lesson instead of "Maxtor's suck" and have to send it back.

2004-10-02 10:36:08 403

Mississippi State played like, well Mississippi State and LSU and Alabama played like, well Mississippi State.

Blinkg out your watch!

2004-10-02 02:40:56 402

When you go somewhere and end up talking to a girl who graduated from ACCS in 1988, should you feel old?

There were more profound thoughts but they have lost their anchors.

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